Wag`s Secret Diary

Whilst Baldy, (my master), has gone to fetch some beers, I thought I’d fire up this computer thingy, and start my own secret diary. So here goes!

Monday 2nd June 2009

No sooner had I wolf down my breakfast and drunk my tea (milk, strong, no sugar), I was in the van and off to work. I like it at Farndon Cemetery because Neil (grounds man) always makes a fuss of me. I love the attention. Nevertheless, (note to self) I have noticed that he never has any biscuits –hmmm

In- between jobs I was expecting to be taken for a walk in the nearby park. In fact I was looking forward to it. However, my master decided that his belly came first and off he went to the shop, for pies and butties. (As if he needed them). The van was cramped and stuffy and, I did not want to be left alone. I got anxious and worked myself up into a right tizzy. The upshot was – I puked, big time.

I got it on his steering wheel, his seats, his hand brake and, gear stick. I even managed to get it inside his radio cassette player. Yes, I did a good job of pebble dashing his dash board. Laugh – I very nearly followed through.

On his return, he blew his top, and I was immediately banished (in disgrace) to the back of the van. I never did get to run in the park. Sadly, my master had splashed out on some scrummy, gongle-dangling chew sticks. Needless to say, I did not get any.

That evening old blabbermouth could not wait to tell his wife (my mistress), of my mishap. He was still angry, but I just flashed my big sad Labrador eyes and it worked a treat. She told him, it was his fault for leaving me on my own – result!

With that, I was taken to the stables for a run around with my old mate Scrappy, whilst my master spent his evening disinfecting his van. Bad dog!

Ok, my master’s back – so for now, Bow Wow – WAG.

P.S – I think that Churchill dog’s a right knob. (ohhhhhh yes!)